Panic, manifestos, and pretty pretty pictures

This is not for you to understand; just me...

2008-11-16T22:10:00.001-05:00

This made my heart hurt...

Nuria: it was just weird though cause i was in bed with him and i only wanted you to be there instead.

Wow!!

2008-11-13T13:20:00.001-05:00

Dexter turns 6 months old today!!! Half a year. ;) Amazing.

Little Dexter gets neutered

2008-11-11T09:33:00.003-05:00

My poor baby is at the vet being neutered and microchipped today. I dropped him off at 8:00 a.m. and should be picking him up tonight around 5:00 p.m. assuming his survey goes smoothly.

Poor Dexter won't have balls anymore. This must be a sad day for him. ;)

All kidding aside, I'm worried about him. I've heard some horror stories when it comes to neutering... I'm sure he'll be perfectly fine, but I'm his mommy so it is my right to worry.

Body Combat

2008-11-06T21:38:00.000-05:00

I went to the gym at 8:30 this morning. I worked out for half an hour and then joined the Body Combat class. It is an incredibly fun high impact cardio class that incorporates various forms of martial arts. I can’t wait for class next week!
The unfortunate thing was coming home ready to study and getting a major migraine that wouldn’t go away. I took a nap to see if that would help and took 3 Motrin but it only lessoned it slightly. So I haven’t gotten any work done today. Hopefully tomorrow I can be more productive.

I talked with Thierry tonight. It’s been almost a year since we’ve really spoken. He warned me against going to Arizona before I went the second time but of course I am stubborn and went anyway. It was exciting to find out he is getting his own loft! I can’t wait to see it.

I want to try to sleep early but with my nap I highly doubt I’ll manage it.

Goodlife

2008-11-05T21:39:00.002-05:00

I spent the entire afternoon (12:30 p.m. - 6:00 p.m.) at the hospital with my Mom. I'm worried because she has a painful, swollen parotid gland. She had an ultra sound done this morning and blood work taken this evening. Hopefully the antibiotics will help; if not, we'll be back at the hospital soon enough.

Despite the wait at the hospital (a place I despise), today turned out to be rather decent.

I managed to sneak over to Goodlife Fitness for a tour of the club. I signed up, unfortunately under a one year contract, and can begin working out tomorrow. I'm so excited that my schedule permits me to get out once again. October was full of stress because of my hectic schedule. I wanted to get a YMCA membership but decided against it because of the distance. Goodlife is a 15 - 20 minute walk from my house whereas the Y is a 40 minute bus ride (which would tack on $80 to my membership fee for a bus pass since I am STILL not driving). Goodlife is strictly women here which is a tad bit disappointing; but I have already met two great people (one of which I am taking an aerobics class with on Friday). I'm serious about losing the extreme amount of weight I gained from taking medication last winter. It is all about lifestyle changes, right? Hopefully this will help with my sleep patterns, my mood and my energy level.

Oh, and worth mentioning, tonight when I signed online to check my e-mail accounts, this message was waiting for me in my inbox: "I love you young lost messed-up bi-polar creative types." Quite clever. ;) This guy is worth speaking to (if only for the comic relief).

PS: My eldest brother turns 27 today! Happy Birthday, Doug!!

McCain's Speech

2008-11-04T23:45:00.002-05:00

The crowd at McCain’s concession speech was ridiculous; the booing was such a disgrace and rather classless.

It appeared McCain was embarrassed but I suppose it is hard to read people on television. His speech was graceful in my opinion but it's hard to tell if it was genuine. He admitted his failure tonight but if he had behaved this gracefully during his campaign perhaps the numbers would have been closer? I strongly believe Americans want a "new America". Change is important now, regardless of race.

All I can say is, thankfully I am not in Phoenix tonight.

Victory for Barack Obama!

2008-11-04T23:09:00.003-05:00

Barack Obama has been declared the 44th president of the United States and is the first African American president in U.S. history.

The Democrats also hold control over the senate in this historic election.

What a fantastic new beginning for the United States.

Obama has achieved such an incredible thing tonight.

I can't even begin to describe how amazing this is to witness.

U.S. Election

2008-11-04T22:05:00.000-05:00

Obama is projected to take Ohio in the 2008 U.S. presidential election. This is a key win for the Democrats as no Republican has won a presidential election without taking victory over Ohio.

What I find absolutely mind boggling is tuning in to ABC right now; the Republicans are already playing the blame game. With 8 years of Bush’s mistakes for McCain to repair, the economic crisis, Obama spending a ridiculous amount of money on his campaign, etc Republicans are under a huge amount of stress to capture America’s votes. But what about the American people wanting change? Why aren’t they mentioning that? Hmm.

Welcome to November

2008-11-01T20:26:00.002-04:00

I've finished my exams. Didn't do as well as I would have liked. I won't get my final grades back for a few weeks but hopefully I did okay.

My new semester starts today. I've cracked open a few books already. I need to write up a schedule to follow. And getting to sleep at a decent hour will be beneficial.

I took Dexter out last night in his devil costume. My brother and I walked him around the neighborhood so he could see all the children. He seemed quite amused and at times a bit freaked out. It was adorable.

I heard from G. He says he needs time right now. I don't blame him. Losing someone close to you is incredibly hard.

Speaking of losing someone close, Babu passed away 2 years ago on the 3rd. Last year I went skydiving for the first time on that day but ended up spending my night crying and feeling rather useless.

Death is hard.

300th post - I should be more excited...

2008-10-28T14:46:00.005-04:00

Today is turning into a difficult day. I'm supposed to be studying but I can barely concentrate.

October has been one hell of a long month. I just want it to be over but it doesn't feel like it's going to end anytime soon. Just a few days away but it feels like weeks.

I'm feeling really trapped right now. I need to move but lack the means to do so. I am starting to feel the pressure on all ends. I think I am mostly just missing the freedom I used to have.

I'm also missing this...

It's the one city that I feel so free in.

Wassup...

2008-10-27T15:35:00.000-04:00

Bored

2008-10-26T17:51:00.003-04:00

Studying is proving to be rather boring - and time consuming. :(

Only 4 more days of this.

Not Much

2008-10-25T21:11:00.002-04:00

Nothing new to report. I've been studying most of the afternoon but wishing I could be with G. I can only imagine how this is affecting him; and I can't even give him hugs.

I'm attempting to change the layout of this blog a bit; nothing major (I don't think). I need to steer away from studying for a bit. I don't want to cause information overload. I like to study a chapter and then stop for awhile. It seems to work for me.

I might head down to Toronto on the 31st. There is an Athabasca student coffee at 4:00 p.m. that I would love to attend. I'm really beginning to miss the social interaction of college. Don't get me wrong, I love studying at my own pace as well as the challenge university is providing but some social interaction would be nice.

Dexter begins his intermediate training classes on Monday night. I'm super excited. I wish G could come though. He loves dogs :) That quality is so important to me.

Come on October 30th - I just want this semester to end.

Awe.

2008-10-24T15:58:00.004-04:00

I had a magnificent weekend. I wish I could have posted sooner but my schedule has been hectic. G and I spent Sunday night in Niagara Falls. It was sweet; he booked a room at the Sheraton overlooking the falls. We had a wonderful dinner at the Hard Rock and spent our evening becoming closer. :)

I was supposed to see him on Wednesday but his work schedule didn't allow it. And then again today but unfortunately a friend of his family past away last night. :( It's so sad and I can only hope he is doing okay... My thoughts are with you and your family, love.

I've finally completed my final essay so now all I have left is two exams on October 30th. Study time.

G is For? ;)

2008-10-18T20:57:00.003-04:00

I am so happy. Things went so well today. We went to a shooting range out in West Lincoln and I fired two super nifty riffles. We also spotted horses grazing in a field and got photos of me petting and feeding the horses. We then took off to Denny's in Niagara Falls and continued the rest of the day driving around Niagara and talking for hours.

I am on a cloud.

Done Essay

2008-10-17T20:19:00.003-04:00

Woohoo! I am done one of my 20 page essays. This means I am officially completed my Experiential Learning in the Celebration of Diversity course!

Only one left to go!! And then two final exams of course.

The end is near! I am getting rather excited.

And tomorrow I am suppose to meet with someone lovely. We've been spending so much time talking, it's surprising the amount of work I've been able to accomplish! But he is a fantastic influence.

We're apparently going to a shooting range to prep for hunting season. Hunting it cruel but how fun would it be to go and shoot in the woods with my camera... perhaps... we shall see if I can make time.

I can't remember being this happy in months! :) Eeek, so excited!

Now onto my final essay.

Election

2008-10-14T15:37:00.002-04:00

Today is election day in Canada. I was up bright and early to vote.

What saddens me is, most people I speak to do not take the time to vote. What took me a short 4 minutes, from walking into my polling station to walking out the door, is considered a waste of time to so many Canadians. They tell me they are far too busy to care about politics. Yet in turn, these people end up complaining about the Canadian government. I don't know about you, but to me that sounds rather ironic.

My theory on voting is, a lot of people gave up their lives in order for us to have the ability to vote. To not vote dishonours their sacrifice.

We live in such a wonderful country. Vote. It literally takes minutes.

Polls close at 9:30 p.m.

5 Months!

2008-10-13T22:05:00.001-04:00

Dexter is 5 months old today! And he is now 10 lbs. :)

Turkey Day!

2008-10-13T14:01:00.002-04:00

Happy Thanksgiving!

I think I'm going to get a kitten tonight in Niagara-on-the-Lake, eeeeek. But he isn't for me, he's for my brother. ;)

Dexter and Canned Food

2008-10-13T00:05:00.001-04:00

I have no idea how to get my little guy to eat dry food again. My mother started feeding Dexter canned food and all of a sudden he wants absolutely nothing to do with his dry food.

This is really frustrating.

It's About Staying Strong

2008-10-11T22:45:00.002-04:00

I've been lying to myself. For years now. It was my way of putting things behind me. It worked but it was such a temporary fix. Now that everything is out on the table I am moving on and it feels good. I'm stuck in a bad place because of past decisions but in time I'll move on from this. I have faith. I am such a strong believer in fate. This happened for a reason. I may never find out why, but all I can do is work through it. And for the people who stuck by me, thank you; I cherish you. And for the people you left when times were rocky, fuck you; I never needed you to begin with.

This life is so magnificent. There is so much to do and see.

Hopefully I'll meet some amazing people on my journey.

Tee's

2008-10-10T23:44:00.001-04:00

I really want a Surf Saudi t-shirt. Brilliant.

Course Extension

2008-10-09T14:30:00.003-04:00

I spoke with Athabasca U this morning and was able to get a course extension on my PSYC205 Portfolio Development class until December 31, 2008. I'm not completely out of trouble though as my course load is quite extensive next semester.

I'm now enrolled in for next semester (November 1-February 28):

PSYC290 General Psychology
PSYC304 Research Methods in Psychology
PSYC315 Psychology and the Mass Media
PSYC379 Social Psychology.

But my stress has now been significantly reduced. I have two major essay's left to write and two final exams and then I can work on my Portfolio Development class.

I should have applied for this course extension a month ago, it would have saved me a lot of pressure and stress.

Awesome. I'm happy.

My Artsy Self ;)

2008-10-08T20:51:00.001-04:00

Among school, I have been self reflecting. In my earlier years, high school primarily, I used to be extremely open minded. I was so alive, so free, almost careless. I spent my days reading, writing and taking photographs. I was caught up in this huge web of creativity that seemed endless. And then everything stopped as reality hit me. I went to college to study technical theatre. I should have studied photography but thought studying theatre would help achieve a creative balance. It didn't. Now being wrapped up doing my psychology degree, with little time to do anything else, I've been experiencing these little bursts of creativity, and spontaneity... like I used to. I believe it is because I've been sorting myself out, figuring out all of these issues that I've accumulated over the last little while. As I work through each one, it seems easier to see myself as I used to. It will be fantastic to devote myself back to my art like I used to, I cannot wait for this semester to be over.

No Phoenix

2008-10-06T01:16:00.005-04:00

I'm not heading to Phoenix anymore.

Things change.

People give up on people because they are weak. I was definitely weak. I did things I'm not proud of and that upsets me. I hate hurting people. And I hate being hurt.

But maybe that just shows love was never there to begin with. I don't really know. That could be me being rash.